pandzzz

I get LSS over my own composition... So I'm typing the lyrics here in hopes that this'll put a stop to random memories that are best forgotten.

Hey you, it's been a while

And I know that you miss me

Don't try to deny it

You just might grow your hair back

And you won't be Lex Luthor anymore

Hey you, you're an oldie now

But don't worry you still have market value

We'll go to Divisoria

Manong kutsero will take you for a free ride

on naglalaway na horsie

Ice cream and meteor woot-woot

Do that shoulder shrug I taught you

You'll make a good dancer with a sparkling head

These tarsier eyes can tell

(repeat)

But seriously

Let's celebrate

We'll say apir!

Until the dawn

Coz here and now

We have no regrets

Just let the good ol' times roll

Ice cream and meteor woot-woot

Do that shoulder shrug I taught you

You'll make a good dancer with a sparkling head

These tarsier eyes can tell

(repeat)

Hey you, it's been a while

And I know that you'll miss me...

I will definitely miss singing this simple tune

pandzzz

What is that phrase

that most overused phrase

the phrase that carries so deep a meaning it confounds the wise in its simplicity?

three simple words...

three simple words used so haphazardly at every moment, every play, every song, every movie, every note, every book, every thought, every dream.  yet the struggle at every intonation so hard to read.  used so sincerely it precludes passion... used so timely it suffices the now... used so carelessly it destroys... but perhaps if used as firmly as an encryption in stone then it would last.

It's amazing how three simple words could ignite a multitude of emotions.  FEAR--my number one friend and foe--though subtle, strikes like a strong undercurrent that preys on the unguarded. Be vigilant! What makes them think an excuse would merit the right to be impulsively fickle at whim?  The cycle of reality!  That's it!  What a poor, poor excuse. 

Come on, say it.  Tell me for the nth time... the three simple words... then tell me again how we live in such a contradictory world that there's just no way of breaking this cycle of bullshit.  Finally, say to me again, "That's life." That's life--haha--either you accept it or you reject it.  Either way is the same anyway.  Take the fall, it's just a bruise... A bruise one too many already.  Do you wanna know what could really break a person?  It's not fear... no.. not fear at all.  Fear is just a precautionary tool.  Pain?  No, not pain either... pain is relatively just skin deep.  The real clincher in the formula is HOPELESSNESS.  You lose hope and you're just as good as dead.

pandzzz

an attempt at poetry :p

what are you so afraid of
you wear your mask so tight
i can see right through you

cowardice shouting itself
wisdomless sheer stupidity

we go over it again
what's wrong with you
nothing... nothing

you wear your mask so tight

not knowing someday
as clear as light
truth comes begging

nothing... nothing
merciless nothing

numb and
not a hint

pandzzz

our pet cat died today.  He was about 7 months old.  I couldn't say how old he was for certain because he was just given to us once he no longer needed the attention of his birth mom.  I don't really want to expound on how he died.  I didn't even witness it.  All I can say is that it was tragic but no one should be blamed for it.  We all loved him and we're all gonna miss him so much.

He used to sit beside me all day, either to cuddle up and sleep amidst the coziest pillows he could find or to simply get my attention.  Even as he grew older (well not that old since he never even reached a year) he always had this curiously innocent and very intent look on his face.  Trust me, i know.. Hehe, I'm not going crazy here in trying to read what's on a cat's mind.  He was more than a piece of entertainment to me.  Although he didn't understand the words i was uttering before he died, it felt as though i could say anything to that cat.  I remember myself crying recently and he was there (whether he sensed that i was sad or not) to put a smile on my face.  He was a really really funny cat.  This is how i wanna remember him.  FUNNY CAT... one like a child.  i think he had this uncanny ability (at least, for a cat) to empathize genuinely with humans.  He wasn't like other cats who just did pacute when you've got food with you.  Sometimes he even preferred our company than the actual food he was eating.  Yes, he was that KSP.

***

Dear Wentworth (the cat's name),

          I shall never forget your piercing stare and your perfect fur.  When I used to say, "Baby, ang baho mo!" it was probably true but that was just lambing and I actually meant to say, "You're so cute, it's so hard to resist hugging you."  If you get reincarnated to become a man and actually live long enough, I'd probably find you and marry you.  We love you, Wentworth M*******!!!  We always will.   But we'll see each other again one day.  I hope you'll recognize me as the one who loved you enough to feed you stuff you don't even eat (like Cheerios.)  Haha, funny cat, you are simply IRREPLACEABLE.

Love,

Panda

P.S.  You should have heard my kuya mourn your passing.  It was heartbreaking.  I didn't even hear it, but my sister described how he almost choked with every word.

***

his piercing eyes

his playful side

in pain but oh so patient with his cast

pandzzz

missing him.. i want curly tops.